In a post that went virala mother said her daughter is currently in a relationship with her son’s “first love”.
Posting to Reddit’s ‘Am I The A**hole’ (AITA) forum under the username u/AITAsonsfirstgf, the mother said her son was upset about the relationship, but felt he needed to “grow up and get over it.” The post garnered more than 7,500 upvotes and hundreds of comments from Redditors who agree that her son’s feelings are “ridiculous”.
Some psychologists say that for various chemical and neurological reasons, first loves are hard to forget.
“Some of the same neurotransmitters that are triggered in other addictions are also activated when we are in love, such as endorphins, dopamine and serotonin,” Dr. Robin Buckley told Bustle.
“A bit like an addict’s first high from a gambling win…we want to relive that ‘first time’. That’s one of the reasons [why] forgetting a first love is difficult. Our brains remember the neurochemical ‘high’ associated with it and want that experience to come back,” Buckley said.
Joseph Bordelon, a licensed counselor, also said that first love leaves an “imprint” on the brain.
“Your first love is hard to forget because it leaves an ‘imprint’ on the sensory areas of your brain,” Bordelon told Bustle. “Memories of your adolescence leave hormonal imprints at the same time as your neurological developments form your identity.”
Although first loves can be hard to forget, Buckley says it’s both possible and beneficial for people to “move on.”
“This is where you are now,” Buckley said. “Only you can make the decision to stay here and move forward into your future, rather than regress into your past.”
Unfortunately, it looks like u/AITAsonsfirstgf’s son is struggling to learn that lesson.
At the start of his post, u/AITAsonsfirstgf said his son Adam, 26, dated Jenna when they were both 11. The two finally broke up after five months because Jenna “didn’t like kissing” Adam, but he “got over it.” rapidly.”
Now Adam is married to someone else and his sister Lila is dating Jenna.
“Lila is in love. She’s been open about being a lesbian since she was a freshman in high school, but she never showed much interest in anyone until Jenna. I’m so happy to see her finally satisfied with this aspect of her life.” said u/AITAsonsfirstgf.
Adam, on the other hand, thinks the relationship is “weird” and called Lila a “backstabber” and a “bitch”.
“His main arguments are that [the relationship is] tainting the memory of his first love and that Jenna hurt him when she broke up with him,” u/AITAsonsfirstgf told u/AITAsonsfirstgf, adding that she’s “almost had enough” of Adam’s attitude.
“He’s a married man…I could understand that if it was a serious relationship, even high school would be different. But they were…kids back then. How could that still matter? important? she continued.
u/AITAsonsfirstgf told Adam she would limit contact with him if he didn’t grow up. In response, Adam accused his mother of “choosing Lila” over him.
“But I don’t see it that way; I think I choose to protect my own sanity, not choose between my children,” u/AITAsonsfirstgf concluded. “AITA? »
The editors said u/AITAsonsfirstgf did nothing wrong by confronting Adam and agreed he needed to grow up.
“NTA [not the a**hole]. While I understand it might be weird for Adam… you’re right, he has to get over it. He’s grown up and married,” showmethegreen said.
“NTA, your son NEEDS to grow up, and you were right to tell him that… It’s totally unreasonable for him to get mad at his sister because she fell in love with a girl he’s with out when he was a kid.” u/Sklibba wrote.
u/Corpuscular_Ocelot added, “I’m usually [pro]”Just stay away from your friends and family’s exes,” but he was 11. He’s ridiculous.”
Newsweek contacted u/AITAsonsfirstgf for comment.
Other Viral Posts
Posting to Reddit on Tuesday, a woman said she told her “jealous” sister that she hoped she “never had kids.”
On Wednesday, a woman said she embarrassed a colleague after catching said colleague flirting with her husband.
And on Thursday, a woman went viral after sharing that she dumped her boyfriend over a “strange and embarrassing” comment he made.